here you can see for miles & miles & miles

On Thursday, October 22, my mom and sister arrived here in New York to spend a long weekend with me. It's been exactly four years since the last time any of my family visited me here. Four years ago I was a terrified, homesick student who didn't know Uptown from Downtown on the subway. I laughed with my mom and Jennifer because their last trip here was mostly spent in my dorm room watching television and cooking dinner. I felt like a tourist as much as they did. I'd moved there 2 months ago and my sister was pregnant. It was a recipe for a stressful trip. I've come a long way since 2005. A long, long way.

I have a life here in New York now. I have favorite places to go and people to see. I have sources of comfort in this city of hustle and bustle. Somehow I have managed to love this urban city with all its beauty and tragedy. Simply put, I am in awe. I took my mom and sister to favorite places like Roebling Tea Room, Grey Dog (where I get lunch on a weekly basis with Katie) and 71 Irving Place (where I spent every weekend studying my senior year of college). We went to the Sunday flea markets which I frequent almost every week, unless there are subway service changes as there have been as of late. We saw Wicked, the "Where the Wild Things Are" exhibit at the Morgan Library, ate at Chelsea Market and Frankies on the Lower East Side, saw the Robert Frank exhibit at the MET, the Pumpkin Festival at Central Park, FAO Swartz to get gifts for Caleb and Seth, and rode the Staten Island Ferry. I introduced them to the Marriott kids and they saw where I go to work everyday. I showed them my life and I showed them New York. I think I wore them out, but we checked off everything on our list except the Brooklyn Bridge.

At the Morgan Library gift shop, I bought a book of poems about New York. I've only read a few, but I enjoyed this one in particular.

Whitman in Black by Ted Barrigan

For my sins I live in the city of New York

Whitman's city lived in in Melville's senses, urban

inferno

Where love can stay for only a minute

Then has to go, to get some work done

Here the detective and the small-time criminal are one

& tho the cases get solved the machine continues to run

Big Town will wear you down

But it's only here you can turn around 360 degrees

And everything is clear from here at the center

To every point along the circle of horizon

Here you can see for miles & miles & miles

Be born again daily, die nightly for change of style

Hear clearly here; see with affection; bleakly cultivate

compassion

Whitman's walk unchanged after its fashion

Gradually

I am a dinosaur when it comes to technology. I'm not like my parents in that I am unable to attach pictures to emails or only send text messages in all caps because I can't figure out how to change the setting on my cell phone. But I do seem to only update the few pieces of technology I own when it is absolutely necessary. The computer I am typing on right now I received as a high school graduation gift over four years ago. It survived several viruses and a bath in a bottle of coca cola. My cell phone is a $30 replacement for my old phone which died on me almost two years ago. It's a black flip phone. 'Nuf said when all my friends have iPhones. I have an iTouch which was my last update of technology because the iPod that I also got as a high school graduation gift was replaced 6 times under a Best Buy warranty that finally expired. 

I like to think of myself as adaptable and open to new adventures. But clearly, I don't adapt unless I have to. That's why after posting one tweet I never visited Twitter again because it was too confusing and not like Facebook. 

When I love something I wear it out quickly. Whether it's a favorite song, book, or sweater, I listen, read, or wear it everyday until I find something new to obsess over. Lately it's been "Only with Laughter Can You Win" by Rosie Thomas, Traveling Mercies by Anne Lamott, and a grey sweater jacket I stole from Kristin's closet. These things give me comfort and simple pleasure, like the tree with yellow leaves in the school parking lot across the street. It's beautiful and will change but I will enjoy it until then. 

I've also found enjoyment in little things while at work with the kiddos, mostly all the silly things they say. Some days I get stressed and feel like I have a long list of household chores to do that I forget to just have fun with Hank, Drew, and Claire. Usually by Friday I am burnt out and ready for the weekend. But last night, instead of cleaning up the kitchen right away, I watched Scooby Doo: The Mystery Begins with them and prayed with Claire before bed that she wouldn't have nightmares. They helped me pick out a Halloween costume when I couldn't decide between a flapper girl (which they had no idea what that was), Harry Potter, and a disco ball. Claire voted Harry Potter because I could be a boy even though I'm really a girl. Hank voted disco ball because he doesn't like Harry Potter. And Drew voted disco ball because she wanted to help me make a silvery sequined dress. They told me they really wanted me to be Michael Jackson, since I'm related to him ("Having the same last name means you're related, Julie. I'm only 6 and I already know that," Drew) but a disco ball would be a close second. Earlier this week, Drew told me she wished you could throw away conversations, "If I could throw one conversation in the trash it would be Michael Jackson. I wouldn't even put it in the recycling!" 

When I was young
I did it my way
I did it my way and I still do
Held my head up high
Asking God for answers and begging him to tell me what to do

(Play Music by Rosie Thomas)